Q:Can I say something to the last Anon? This is actually how I feel, and I'm a trans* guy. It seems to be a fairly common for dysphoria to go away when you don't think about it and I think it's because during those moments you have nothing to prove that you're not whatever gender you identify as. However, this could be different for other people because there is no one way to be trans*. However, it is also not uncommon to not care about being taken as your sex when you're in early transition.
Q:So, awkward question time. I'm a trans* guy who loves futanari porn. Is this offensive to trans* girls?
Neither of us are trans* women, but I’ve personally read posts by trans* women saying that it is considered fetishistic and that they found it offensive. Some trans* women may disagree, but I can’t recall reading posts by trans* women who enjoyed/supported it. Of course, you can’t control your kinks, but it may be a good idea to keep that in mind.
#nsfw a bit
Q:I have a question, hope you guys can help me. For a few month now I have the feeling that I could be trans, felt that way before when I was younger, but then later it was alright for me to be a girl. Today I don't feel good with this anymore and from time to time I have this strong feeling that I really should be a guy and then again I don't think about it and it feels alright as long as I don't overthink it or get taken as a guy. That I am not sure about does this mean I not trans?
We can’t tell you whether or not you’re trans*, Anon—that’s something for you to personally identify with. However, what we can tell you is that there’s no certain, set way to be transgender. There’s no such thing as “not being trans* enough” or even being “too trans*.” Having mixed feelings doesn’t mean you’re not trans*, too. Anyone who tells you otherwise is incorrect.
Also, know that there are more “options” than just male or female—you can identify with both of those, all genders, no gender, a mix of male and female, or your gender identity can change throughout time. I encourage you to experiment with presentation, names, and pronouns if you can, and see what you’re happiest and most comfortable with! Ultimately, your identity is nobody’s but your own. I wish you well on your personal discovery!
Q:To the Ohio anon (and others needing help), GLMA is an online resource to help queer people find healthcare providers that fit their needs. Go to the top bar, hover over "Resources", "For Patients", then click on "Find a provider". From there, search the provider directory. Good luck!
Q:HELP. I'm ftm. And I want to buy a packer. But I can't get one online and I'm going to get my friend to buy one from a sex shop. But would a sex shop sell packers?? HELP!!
To my knowledge, a good number of sex stores sell packers. I think you’d be more likely to find cheaper ones, like the Packy or Mr. Limpy, that don’t have options for STP-ing or penetrative sex. I hope you find what you’re looking for, Anon!
Q:Would anyone mind guiding me to a good gender therapist in the Cincinnati, Ohio area? Thanks.
Anyone out there with suggestions for Anon?
Also, for what it’s worth, a therapist doesn’t have to be a “gender” therapist to give you a proper referral letter; any licensed therapist will do. I’m pretty sure that therapists will put “gender” in their advertisements and etc. just to show that they have experience working with trans* people.
Q:I think glameater is saying not that they decided not to take hormones, but rather that they decided to not transition at all but instead remain living as the sex they were assigned at birth. If that's what they mean then it's a much more tricky issue, since in my mind it kinda would seem a little like internalised transphobia.
Hm, that definitely is a possible interpretation. And you’re right, it does become trickier then due to the existence of internalized transphobia and so on. Generally, it’s my opinion that (with regards to transitioning) people should do what makes them feel happier and comfortable, though sometimes not transitioning might make a person feel “better” because of society telling us that transitioning is a bad thing.
I’ll leave it open until Glameater either corrects me or elaborates.
Q:i'm not sure what i am, but i know i'm not what i was assigned at birth.. i lived that way for so long and spent it all depressed and in pain. i'm young, and i don't think anyone would believe me if i came out as anything... besides, what if i find out afterwards that i was confused and i'm actually something else?
I think this is a very common fear of a lot of people who are thinking about transitioning. My only advice would be to take things one step at a time at your own pace; eventually, you’ll figure out what you need to do. The important thing is to think about yourself with regards to transitioning; don’t ever transition (or not transition) to please anyone else.
For what it’s worth, though, it’s very common for people to not be believed when they come out as trans* no matter what age they are. To use an example, I know a trans man who is in his 50s, been taking T for years, had top surgery, and his family still thinks he’s going through a “stage.” The important thing is realizing that it’s your identity, and that only you can decide or figure out what it is. Best of luck, anon; I hope things go well for you!
Q:I’m a transman. I’m pre-everything but in plan on changing that as soon as I can. I sometimes feel like I’m not taken seriously because I don’t like any body hair, I shave everything, and like wearing eyeliner sometimes. Anyone else like that too?
You keep doing you, Anon! If it makes you happy and confident, or something you just enjoy doing, you’re under no obligation to cater to those cissexist notions that trans men shouldn’t shave or wear eyeliner, or other types of “feminine” things, too!
Q:I just want to thank you for posting this blog. Right now I'm not sure *what* I am other than somewhere between male and female and really not wanting to have my breasts anymore. The thing I struggle most with is my weight, because as long as I'm (unhealthily) overweight my feminine curves and giant chest aren't as obvious. I really want to lose weight but I'm so scared of becoming obviously female again. Not really asking you anything... Just wanted to say it aloud to someone who'd understand.
We’re glad you like the blog! And we hope you can figure out what’s most comfortable for you—best of luck in your personal journey, Anon! If you ever need to talk, we’d be happy to help you out!