Q:in the next couple of months, there is a large chance that my mother will be receiving money from a court case, and after over 2 years thinking about it and thinking that it was something i could only dream of, i have a chance at getting top surgery, but now that its in my reach im starting to really think hard if i want it or not, im still in the inbetween stage where im not sure what i want. and i need advice. should i go for it? im really stressing over it
I’m not sure if you’re talking about FTM or MTF top surgery (mastectomy or breast implants), so I’ll attempt to write this in a way that more or less addresses both when it comes to what you could consider when making your decision. I can speak more to FTM top surgery, since that’s something I’ve experienced myself.
The only person who can decide whether top surgery is right for you is you. I recommend researching all the methods of top surgery available, looking at different surgeons and what sort of results they produce for your body type—for instance, if you’re a larger person, look at before/after photos of larger people instead of muscular or skinny ones. Also keep in mind your chest size if you’re wanting a mastectomy, and look for people whose chests are comparable. By doing this research, you’ll have a relatively good idea of what your chest will look like after you have top surgery, and whether that’s something you want. Remember that results that are a month or two old aren’t good examples of what your chest could potentially look like—look for pictures that were taken at least a year after the surgery. For a mastectomy, scars lighten and flatten over time. For breast implants, the skin starts tight but stretches and relaxes over time.
It’s also important to consider your genetics, especially when it comes to surgery that would leave significant scarring, like double-incision. If your family develops keloid or hypertrophic scars (if I remember correctly, the darker your skin the more likely you are to have trouble with keloids), you could potentially have them too. To speak from experience, I developed hypertrophic scars after top surgery, which means they’re a bit darker and stick out a bit, but they will flatten and lighten over a much longer time than typical scars. Since my scars were never a big concern, I chose DI since it was the best option for my chest and nipple size.
You might also consider writing a list detailing why you would want top surgery. For example, if you bind or use falsies, getting top surgery would mean you wouldn’t have to do that, which may be appealing. If you experience chest dysphoria, top surgery may help that significantly. Again, the only person who can decide whether top surgery would help with these things is you. Going through each reason and deciding how important they are to you is also very helpful.
I also recommend reading blogs of other trans people who have undergone top surgery. They might discuss why they got top surgery, how the healing process went, how their results looked, what sort of problems they encountered, and so on. All of that information can help you make an informed decision.
The bottom line here, I suppose, is the more information you have on any procedure, the better! I hope that helps you somehow, Anon.