Q:Someone was asking about boy clothes, I have a shit ton. I would love to exchange them for girl clothes but not necessary. PM me on this account or my main account
Anyone wanting to swap clothing should message this person!
Q:whats wrong with truscum?
Quite a few things. Historically, self-ID’d truscum/”true transsexuals” have:
- Denied/disrespected nonbinary identities (though I have come across some self-ID’d truscum nonbinary people)
- Policed the genders of other people based on constructed gender roles (e.g. “You can’t enjoy sewing if you’re a man” or “You must wear makeup to be a woman”). These included sexual orientation as well in the past. More on how these “standards” have changed in a bit.
- Bullied young trans people who are just figuring things out, which can be absolutely devastating in an already tumultuous time
- Spread false information about the medical aspects of transitioning, typically to scare others who are considering transitioning
- Blamed the testosterone shortage on DAFAB nonbinary people who are taking it, an outright lie
- Set arbitrary “standards” for being trans—they recently considered femme trans men or butch trans women to be “not actual men/women.” These standards have changed to become “easier” over the years (most recently it’s that you must have dysphoria to be trans and seem to no longer propagate gender-essentialist ideas), which essentially means they were meaningless in the first place. (My personal beliefs are that dysphoria is fluid in the first place and can change based on context/the individual in question; it doesn’t always manifest itself in specific ways and can sometimes be difficult to describe. Trouble sleeping or paying attention, for instance, can be due to dysphoria BUT it might be because of something else. There’s no such thing as a “kilodysphoreter” to empirically measure how dysphoric someone may or may not be feeling, so it’s meaningless to say that someone “must” be dysphoric.)
- Propagated racist, sexist, homophobic, etc. beliefs (denying the existence of NB identities is inherently racist as these gender IDs are frequently culturally significant to various cultures; I have also seen trans male truscum claim that sexism isn’t real/a big deal)
- Essentially tolerated/accepted claims of noted TERFs like Janice Raymond and her ilk.
- Claimed that inclusive trans-activism that isn’t gender-essentialist has set back the movement, when typically these folks don’t do *anything* as far as trans-activism goes.
I’m sure I’m missing some stuff that ought to be mentioned, and these are based on mine and a few others’ observations of truscum blogs. Hope that sheds some light on your question, anon. That’s all that’ll be said on the matter here; I’m not keen on flooding anyone’s dashes with truscum-related asks.
Q:I really like this blog! u.u
Thank you! We’re really glad to hear you do! :D
Q:(Not really a question but?) it really annoys me that there are so many people that support trans women, non binary, Genderfluid, etc but hate trans men. It's good to support trans women and stuff but then blatantly hating on trans men? It just peeves me
Yeah, I personally agree with this. There’s no doubt in my mind that there are groups of trans men who are deserving of criticism (e.g. truscum and other essentialists) but to paint trans men with a broad brush is hurtful and only creates divides in an already-divided movement (the name for this is “horizontal hostility,” which is when members of the same group are hostile towards each other, and both truscum and “transmisandrists” do this). It’s absolutely true that by and large trans women experience the brunt of transphobia, but that doesn’t negate the problems trans men face (such as invisibility, lack of access to reproductive health care, dealing with perceived sexism/misogyny when being perceived as a woman, and not to mention a slew of others that exist in other countries with very strict roles for people based on ASAB or the specific problems that trans men of color, trans men with disabilities, and trans men who aren’t heterosexual face).
I get the sense that this answer will crack open a can of gross stuff so for the sake of everyone following the blog, this is all I’m gonna say about it.
Q:So this trans mtf kid at my school goes by emma now. Which im totally cool with other then hes a douche. But what reallly aggravates me is she tricks guys into sleeping with her then brags. When the guys are 100%%straight and didnt now who she was.
#misgendering though that might be a typo. #transphobia just in case.
I have very strong doubts over the legitimacy of this ask. The idea of trans women “tricking” straight men into sleeping with them is a pretty violent and untrue stereotype that contributes to the deaths of trans women. Secondly… those guys are still straight, if they identify that way, because they’re sleeping with a trans woman, if what you’re saying is true.
Why are you sending this to us in the first place, anon?
Q:Today when I put on a "real" binder for the first time(I always used things that didn't work well but I just made one that works well enough today) I didn't feel ecstatic like I thought I would. I just felt less uncomfortable, and then when I took it off I felt more uncomfortable than usual. Don't most people feel really happy when they put on a better binder for the first time?
There isn’t one ultimate, “correct” way to feel after we accomplish things for our transition. Everybody experiences things differently for a wide variety of reasons. To speak from personal experience: A lot of trans folks talk about how ecstatic and perfect they felt after having top surgery. After mine, I just felt a quiet sort of relief; nothing remotely close to “ecstasy.” My point is that no feelings are incorrect or “wrong” to have when we first put on a binder/falsies or take our first dose of HRT, and so on, because nobody reacts the exact same way to something.
Survey About Non-Binary Gender
Hi- My name is Skylar Amari, and I’m a non-binary student at RIT who is doing research on non-binary people. I would appreciate it if you would take this survey if you are non-binary, and pass it along to those on your mailing list. My findings could help to obtain visibility and rights for non-binary people. Please see the formal letter below. Thank you!
_ _ _
We would like to ask for your help in conducting a research study about people who identify their gender as non-binary. The purpose of this study is to examine how people who identify as non-binary feel about their gender, and how non-binary people are affected by a lack of inclusion. What we learn in the study will help us better understand a group of understudied people.
The study consists of an online survey. The survey takes approximately 30 minutes to complete. In the survey, you will be asked to complete a series of demographic questions, a scale asking to relate your feelings about your gender, a scale with questions about your childhood and a scale that asks about symptoms of anxiety.
If you choose to participate in this study, you have the option of entering into a raffle for the chance to win a $25 gift card. If you are a student in a psychology course at RIT, you may be able to earn SONA credits for one of your courses.
We hope you will be able to help us explore a gender identity that is often excluded from research. Please take this survey only if you identify as non-binary and are 18 years or older. The link to the survey can be found here (https://clipboard.rit.edu/take.cfm?sid=nbex). If you have any questions, please contact Skylar Amari at (607) 244-7674 or email@example.com (email is preferred), as well as Dr. Kirsten Condry at (585) 475-4556, or firstname.lastname@example.org. We look forward to hearing from you.
Rochester Institute of Technology
Department of Psychology
Q:Hi, I was wondering if this was normal. I'm a trans guy. But I like the female gender role better than the male. I like how girls are treated in general, I would just dress more feminine but I don't like how feminine guys are treated or feminine guys clothes. Does that make sense? I don't know why I feel like this or what to do about it. Because I don't want to be seen as a girl, I just want to be treated the way most girls are without actually having people see me as one.
Since gender identity is separate from our preferences for how we’re treated/what we want to do, whether or not you prefer one gender role over the other has very little bearing on your gender identity. Anyone here have a similar experience to Anon?